The Trouble With Everyone's Hair
by SunnyHinata
Summary: Being that every human being has at least one ongoing problem in their life, shinobi can't be excluded.


Featuring: Sakura Haruno

Warnings: Mild SasuSaku, and _extremely _mild swearing.

Word count: 3,090

The Trouble with Everyone's Hair: Calling Her Bluff

Sakura Haruno didn't particularly hate her hair color, but she wanted something new; something fresh. Ino was always calling her names like 'Pinky' and 'Strawberry head', but Sakura couldn't think of any names for Ino besides 'Blonde Bimbo' and that was getting old fast. And so it struck her: why not go blonde? That way Ino couldn't insult Sakura because she would be insulting herself!

-o-

"Mom, I think I want to go blonde." 21 year old Sakura said to her mother one spring day. The young girl was currently seated in her mother's living room on a polyester couch (itchy but warm) while her mother was doing laundry in the other room.

"What's that dear? You want to go blind?" her mother called skeptically from the other room.

"Mom, I swear I need to get you a hearing aid…" Sakura mumbled under her breath. "No, I said; Mom, I think I want to go blonde!" she repeated.

"What? You want to go bond?" her mother screamed from the other room.

"Honestly mom I don't even know why I talk to you anymore. Everything I say goes in one ear and out the other. You're such a child." Sakura stormed out of her parents house angrily, huffing all the way. Maybe a good walk would clear her head so she would be able to decide whether she wanted to dye her hair or not.

Sakura had only made it a few strides away from her house when she bumped into a familiar face. "Hey Hinata! You'll be honest with me. Do you think I should dye my hair blonde?" Sakura gave a her a concentrated look.

"I d-don't know Sakura. I l-like your hair the way it is. But if you want to ch-change it I'm sure it will look beautiful either way." Hinata replied meekly, fearing Sakura would whip out a can of PMS (you _know_ you fear it too).

'Darn Hinata, she can't be mean.' Sakura thought miserably. "Well, okay. Thanks anyways Hinata. See-ya later!" Hinata shyly waved good-bye as Sakura gave a her a forced grin. As soon as the Hyuga's back was turned, Sakura's smile faded into a scowl. She was never going to decide! 

After some debating, Sakura decided that she would go see Naruto and ask him what he thought about her hair crisis. And since Sakura never knows where Naruto is going to be, she decided to check Ichiraku's first.

-o-

"Hey Naruto." Sakura opened. She had found him inside Ichiraku's, just like she thought she would, gorging on some ramen. The female was now sitting next to him on one of the white and red stools.

"Hoh, Hey Hahura!." he replied with a mouth full of noodles.

"Naruto, please don't talk with your mouth full." Sakura said motherly. "Anyway, I was wondering what you'd say if I dyed my hair blonde."

"Is this a trick question?" Naruto asked numbly, slurping up the rest of his noodles.

"No, I was just wondering," Naruto wore a nervous countenance and sweat trickled down his brow. "Well?"

"Uhh…oh my word! What is that?!?" Naruto pointed dramatically in the opposite direction Sakura was facing. Said female turned away just in time to see nothing, but let her eyes linger on the spot for a few seconds in case she had missed it. What ever 'It' was.

"Naruto, I don't see any-" She turned back to where Naruto sat, or where he _had_ been sitting, only to find they he was now gone and she was presented with the bill. "Nar-u-to!" she grumbled in frustration. Paying the bill, she walked away fuming, with her wallet considerably lighter.

-o-

'That boy,' Sakura griped, _'He can never answer a simple question.' _At that moment Sakura heard a rustle in the bushes nearest her. "Who is it?" she asked apprehensively. 

"Oh bewitching Sakura! What are you doing about on a day like this with no one escort you and keep you safe from strangers?" Rock Lee jumped out of the bushes and bowed to Sakura expressively.

'You mean like you?' "Lee, we've been over this: I can protect myself, I am a _ninja_, but I have a question to ask you." 

"Ask away fair Sakura! I'm sure the question will be a way to portray your superb youthfulness." Lee said enthusiastically (as usual).

"Well, what would you say if I got my hair colored blonde?" Lee gave her a questioning look.

"With a marker? How do you do that?" Lee asked numbly, like someone _else_ we know. Poor Lee.

"No Lee," said Sakura, trying to control her patience, "I mean, like, at a hair solon, or even at my house?"

"Oh Sakura! I don't think you should color your hair. Pink is the most youthful color, next to green of course! You are one of the most youthful people I know besides Gai Sensei. Isn't he the greatest!?!" Lee ranted on, stars bustling around in his eyes.

"Umm...yah whatever you say Lee. Thanks for all your…uhhh…help. I'll see you later…"

"Okay Sakura! I'm sure I will see you soon, but for now I must go off and try to beat my eternal rival Neji!" And he jogged away into the woods, leaving Sakura standing there with a simple-minded look on her face.

"Lee…" the girl sighed, almost laughing at his enthusiasm. At the same time she was still annoyed because so far no one had been any help.

Sakura commenced her walk and watched everyone pass her. _'As _**if**_ they have somewhere to go. Tch.'_ she thought irritably. She stuffed her hands in the pockets of her lounge pants and brooded down the street (sound like someone we know?).

Everyone that she passed gaped at her as if she had something growing on the side of her face. Most people knew what an sun-shiny person Sakura was, so this seemed really strange to them. Finally, someone decided to grow a spine and talk to her. "Hello big lady," said a little girl, "Are you okay?" she asked innocently.

"Huh, what?" Sakura said, coming out for her daze. "Y-yeah, I am. I'm just upset about something." Sakura looked down at the little girl. She was missing one ear.

"What's wrong?" the oblivious little girl asked.

"Oh, it's just people aren't giving me the answers that I want to hear." The little girl gave her a grin.

"You know what I do when I feel bad?" she asked. "I sing a song. It always helps me feel better…how about: 'If you're happy and you know it clap your hands!' " she clapped her hands together loudly. "Come on! You can do it! Just clap your hands." she encouraged.

"O-okay." Sakura clapped her hands as instructed.

"If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands! If you're happy and you know it clap your hands!" she sang. "If you're happy and you know it, then your face will surely show it, if you're happy and you know it clap your hands!" Sakura was smiling already. This was kinda of fun.

"Hey, thanks for your help. I feel better." Sakura stated behind a smile. The girl returned it and skipped away.

-o-

A kid in dark sunglasses and a high-collar jacket was walking across the way from Sakura on the newest street she had turned onto. A low buzzing sound was emitting from beneath his clothing. This boy was none other than the incredible Shino Aburame.

Sakura was going to ask him whether she should color her hair or not, but thought better of it because she didn't really know him all that well and it might seem weird, but before she could even just say hi he said; "No. I don't like blondes."

"Shino, how did you know what I was going to ask?" Sakura asked, startled at the boy's 'psychic' abilities.

"There are some things that we will never know the answers to, like why Shikamaru always makes constant references to the word 'road.' " and with that he glided away, but then turned around at the last second and said: "Hinata told me what you asked her this morning."

and then he disappeared around the corner of a building.

"You know what!?!?" Sakura screeched to no one. "I'm sick of this BS! I'm going to the salon!" and she marched off in some random direction.

-o-

The next day found Sakura walking down the road with a little spring in her step. She had solved her hair crisis, and was quite proud of her decision.

People that had gawked at her the day before were now even more astonished at what they saw. Who would want to get rid of a head of the most original hair? Blonde was so common and most people dreamed of the day they could have pink hair that actually looked natural (Don't we all?).

"Sakuraaaaa!" Naruto screamed from down the road at his teammate.. "What in the WORLD did you do to your hair!" he was almost in tears at that thought of his sister having her hair poisoned.

"Oh nothing. Just a little change that's all. I got tired of you guys not answering me, so I went and got what I wanted." she explained triumphantly with a smug look on her face.

"But…but Sakura-"

"Sakura!?! What in the world did you do to your hair?!?" Tenten exclaimed, coming onto the scene in the middle of the street. "It's...it's not… you." she finished dryly.

"I like it, thank you very much. Now I'm going to get some lunch-"

"But Sakuraaaaa! I don't like blonde, I like pink!" Naruto whined. At that moment, the rest of Team Gai came out from one of the stores. Neji's eyes got big, then shrank and his left eye started twitching. Gai looked astonished, but Lee was the worst.

"Why Sakura why?!? I don't like blondes!" Lee cried, running over to Sakura.

"Naruto, _your_ hair is blonde, and will you people just _except me the way I am_? I'm not changing it and that's that." she spelled out.

"Are you sure?" Tenten clarified. "I don't think Sasuke likes it."

"Huh?" Sakura questioned. She searched around her for the Uchiha and found him at the end of the drag. He was glaring switchblades in her direction. "Uh-oh."

Sasuke whizzed down the road, knocking over several people in the process. He came to an abrupt halt right in front of Sakura. His eyes widened, then narrowed and he forcefully grabbed her wrist, pulling her to close to him.

"What did you do to your hair?" he spat in her face (not literally).

"I dyed it." she said hotly, blushing because of close contact.

"Yah teme, she must have done it yesterday. Isn't it horrible?!?" Naruto pointed out.

Ignoring Naruto's question, Sasuke jerked Sakura up to his face so their noses were almost touching. "Change. It. Back." he ordered, displeased that she had done something so evil to his- I mean her pink hair.

"And If I don't?" she challenged. The others looked at the couple with anticipation.

"I'll beat you until you do." he said in earnest.

"I'd like to see you try." she answered back just as seriously, but with a small smile.

"Isn't it obvious?" Tenten whispered to Naruto while Sasuke and Sakura argued in close proximities.

"What do you mean?" he asked back.

"Sasuke likes her."

"Who, Sakura? No way. He doesn't have feelings like that."

"Kay…whatever." Neji glanced at Tenten and Naruto with an annoyed look on his face (they were interrupting his show) before turning back to Sasuke and Sakura. Tenten smiled at him nervously before looking at the pair in front with a knowing look.

Finally Sasuke grew tired of bickering with his female teammate and stormed off without a word. "Fine. See you later." Sakura called after Sasuke forcibly. "I'm leaving guys. See you later." and she told the rest of them, then assailed away.

Next Day

"Sasuke, I have a hunch." Neji said. The Hyuga had approached Sasuke to talk to him about his jounin mission that he had arrived back from yesterday, but had just decided to bring up the subject of Sakura.

"About what?" the Uchiha inquired.

"About Sakura. I think she's bluffing."

"Huh?"

"I have a way to get Sakura to 'dye' her hair back." Neji said mysteriously.

"I'm listening, and why did you use quotations on 'dye?'"

"Well," Neji explained, "I was checking out Sakura yesterday and-"

"Why were you looking at her!?" Sasuke said angrily, grabbing Neji. The Hyuuga remained unfazed.

"You dolt. I was checking out her _hair_." Sasuke released Neji and gave him a stern look. Neji smirked.

"I want you to call her bluff."

"Huh?"

"Just watch her. I have a plan." Then Neji jumped away.

The Next-next Day

Sasuke got up early the next morning in order to gain the element of surprise. He got dressed and left his house for Sakura's. Hoping that she wasn't awake, the boy climbed up a tree to her window and watched her carefully. She was wearing her hair up in a towel, so Sasuke couldn't tell what color it was.

Passing by, Kiba called out, "Stalker!" then ran like heck down the road. Luckily, Sakura was starting to move, so Sasuke had to ignore him for now.

She turned over, facing the window then opened her eyes. Sasuke made a mad scramble for a different branch and it appeared that he was safe. For now.

Sakura peeled her blankets off herself revealing a pair of red short-shorts and a big blue shirt. She got up from her bed and was about to take her hair down when Sasuke slipped and made a noise. "Shit!"

"Huh?" Sakura asked, whipping around from her mirror to face her window. "Sounds like…" she started, walking over to the window. "Sasuke…?"

Sasuke was lying prone on the ground outside of her bedroom window. Arms in a mangled position, he rolled off his stomach and brought one of his hands up, pinching the bridge of his nose to stop the blood from flowing. "Wow, nice reflexes Uchiha." Sakura mocked from the window.

"Shut up!" Sasuke snarled, getting up from the ground and jumping up the branches of the trees until he reached her window sill. Leaping inside, the boy sat on the edge of Sakura's bed while she stared at him blankly.

"Do you, uhmm, want me to get you something to wipe your nose with?"

"No, I'll just let the blood run all over myself, then wipe it on your sheets." Sasuke said sarcastically, sending a smirk to Sakura.

"No need to be an ass about it." she said while walking to her bathroom and grabbing a few pieces of paper towels. "Here." she said thrusting them into his red hands.

"Thanks." the disheveled boy grumbled.

"I have a question for you; what the _heck_ were you doing watching me sleep at…" she trailed off, glancing over at her clock. "7 o'clock in the morning through a window to my _bedroom_?"

"None of your business." Sasuke stated openly, sopping up the last of his nose bleed discarding the tissues in her garbage.

"Oh really? I happen to know that when people watch me in the early hours of the morning, I have a _right _to know what they want and what they are doing. Ask the Hokage, or would you rather tell her yourself why you are here? I don't care either way." Sakura said, braking out the big guns at the start, hoping that this thing would be over in the next thirty seconds.

"You can't make me do anything. I have rights as well." Sasuke said confidently, almost laughing at his teammate's (seeming) ignorance of the law.

"Well then, I guess I'll have to solve that problem." Sakura said, advancing on him.

"Huh-?" Sasuke got out before he was pulled nose to nose by Sakura. Pink danced on his cheeks as she almost touched his mouth with hers. At the last second, she pulled away and threw the towel off her head.

"Got anything to say? If I had realized it was so easy to get you flustered, I would have done that a long time ago."

"Ha! Your hair is pink!" Sasuke shouted (as loud as his demeanor would allow), trying to change the subject. Sakura looked over to her mirror and didn't even blink.

"Oh, so it is."

"That's all you have to say: _'Oh, so it is.' _That's the lamest thing I've ever heard."

"Well what do you expect? It was one-use dye." Sakura clarified, turning to meet his stunned gaze. "What's that in your voice? Sounds like you didn't like me having a different hair color. Why is that Sasuke? Hm?"

"I didn't want my hair-" he quickly covered his mouth and stared down at floor. A dark red blush enveloped his face, no matter how hard he tried to suppress it.

"Oh ho ho!" Sakura said, straight out laughing at the boy. "Your hair? Last time I checked, it was on my head."

"…" Sasuke was silent, but fought with his inner pimp, debating on weather to reach up and smack her.

"It's ok Sasuke. I know how protective you are." Sakura said, coming over to set next to him on the bed.

"What ever…" He mumbled.

"Now…will you please get _out of my house!"_

The Next-next-_next_ day

The next morning Sasuke opened his eyes reluctantly. He wanted to sleep, seeing as how a shadowed figure had disturbed him all night through dreams. He couldn't remember much, just that he- even what, for that matter- kept coming over and applying this goo to his head. Everything had been extremely hazing, but he vaguely remembered laughter emitting from the person.

Loosing his blanket, the Uchiha lazily slipped off his bed onto the floor. Letting his eyes wonder over to his dresser, he noticed a piece of paper lying on it. Curious, Sasuke army crawled over to his vanity and pulled the paper off, then propped his back up against the wooden mass. Flipping the note open, he read:

Dear Boy-that-doesn't-wake-up-easily,

Hope you like your new do.

p.s. I'm a MASTER of genjutsu, bitches!

-Sakura

Apparently, Sasuke's morning obliviousness was just wearing off, because he just noticed the pink locks falling in front of his face. "Ahhh!" he screamed, shooting up from the floor, while simultaneously bumping his head off his dresser handle. Rubbing his head, he silently cursed Sakura and her teacher.

A/N: Yay for protective Sasuke! I won't be updating this fic for a while, probably not until I finish Of Hotels and Roommates even. I know what chapter two is going to be, but I really need to get the other story finished. And yes, Sasuke's dream was not really a dream, but a haze that covered his mind while Sakura died his hair. She used genjutsu, if that wasn't _completely_ obvious. I also referred to Sakura as Naruto's sister, because that's the way I like to think of them as. If there's any mistakes, please tell me. I hate looking like and idiot :D. Oh yah- go me, I figured out how to align things in the center. It may sound stupid, but I never looked at the tools on fanfiction, I just used my own from Word Processor...


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